THE SACRED STING

The term 'Sacred Sting' came to me while I sitting with the Pink Torch Ginger flower in Singapore when I originally collected it.

It refers to the type of situation in life that arises & triggers some sort of old wound or painful experience ⁠— the sting.

The premise is that this situation is actually a huge gift, because it catalyzes emotional landscapes to come up ~ and come out.

The issue here is that it's not exactly comfortable. 

When really intense feelings or emotions arise ...

anger
nervousness
panic
rage
feeling like we're gonna lose control
grief
freak out
irritability

⁠—it's uncomfortable.

And we can view this discomfort as sacred ⁠— something to be cherished ⁠— like putting compost into the garden. It doesn't smell good. It doesn't look good. It's kind of slimy and gross. But it's actually what makes the field fertile and rich.

So commonly we're really, really hard on ourselves. When we get into an emotional pinch⁠—something is really pinching us or stinging us, we tend to be really hard on ourselves:

"Aren't you over this yet?"

"Shouldn't you be done with this already?"

"What is your problem?"

That type of thinking (or the parts of ourselves that have those thoughts) is actually the thing that prevents us from healing faster. It slows us down.

What to do instead?

Listen here for the Sacred Sting practice:

We can work on having more self-compassion. Just being able to hold an open space within ourselves ⁠— like a container to let feelings come in or go out ⁠— without needing to understand, fix or do anything.

When shit hits the fan and we are overcome with really intense emotions, the most powerful thing we can do is remove ourselves from conversation.

Try not to talk to anyone a lot if you are experiencing a really strong emotion, unless you really need to be heard. There is a difference here in isolating oneself vs. sitting quietly & noticing the sensations in your body. 

For example: if I get really angry, I will sit quietly and observe every aspect of how that feels in my body.

The observation is the dissolution ~ that means that anything we look at changes shape and form.

For example: when I look at my anger, I might notice my heart racing, or more heat in my body. I might want to run or move! I might notice the speed of my thoughts increase. Or maybe a shouting match with myself starts to trickle in: "Why is this bothering you so much? Get a grip!"

The practice of observing is just simply: watching, without getting involved in the story. 

There's nothing that you have to figure out.

You don't have to get to the root of the trigger and where it comes from.

[Sometimes it's helpful to identify the root cause of where a particular pattern is coming from. But what's great is that we don't actually have to know anything about the triggers (the cause or the sources of where it all came from). If we want to understand it, we can; but sometimes that just engages the intellectual mind, which has the potential of tying us up in more knots.]

When you get into situations where intense emotions arise (or a situation that you call a ‘Sacred Sting’), you can take comfort in two things:

1) You don't have to try & understand it. 

2) By being with it, watching it & observing it, it already starts to shift and change ⁠— not only in the short-term (in terms of feeling better), but also in the long-term.

Things literally do come up to come out.

When something is up and on it's way out, we experience it on its way out.

In moments of intensity or extreme situations, we might think that it'll last forever. But if we can slow down, get a little softer, be curious, be compassionate with ourselves ...

"Wow, this is what suffering feels like."

... to just simply be with that sensation, and watch it like we're watching the clouds pass over the sky, it will shift & change. Again: the observation is the dissolution.

A practice for you this week: 

Notice what is arising in you. When difficulty or challenge rises ⁠— no matter how subtle; it doesn't even have to be something really intense & dramatic ⁠— notice when something triggers you. Notice your tendency to either want to figure it out or play it out, or do something with it.

Notice, and then shift your MO to observe it ~ with the full confidence and comfort knowing that simply being with it will transform it in the short-term and the long-term.

Sit quietly & watch. Watch, watch, watch. Observe, observe, observe until the intensity wanes.

The good news is that this method is very simple. It's not easy, but it's simple.

We can use it to uproot deep causes of suffering inside of ourselves.

I only speak & share this from personal experience of having practiced this method for almost 20 years. And I can tell you with full confidence that it works.

If you put it into practice, when a particular situation triggers you, it will trigger you less and less and less. Over time, it reduces the impact & frequency of that particular trigger.

Beautiful Pink Torch Ginger watercolor painting by Alison Van Wyck.

The Pink Torch Ginger [aka: the Sacred Sting flower] essence can be found in our remedy called: True Strength. Check out what it's all about here:

Love & flowers that torch disturbing emotions,
Katie